Process, idea, and reflection.
We finally finish the film!!! 🙂
Me and my cousin felt like we can still add or change something to make it even better but for now, we think this is the most suitable outcome aligned with the storyboard. I think we need to step back for a while since we’ve been editing this for three weekends straight. Again, for the time being, we’re pretty satisfied with what we got. So happy to finally share it!
The progress is slower than we expected because of a lot vfx happening, especially on the act 2 part. We need to clean out the studio and change it to black background.
For now, we’re done with the final cut, and currently doing colour grading and finishing. I’m hoping we can finish and get the final video tomorrow. Fingers crossed!
We started late on the 2nd day. We were supposed to start the makeup at 9am but the makeup artist came pretty late (but it’s okay, her mom’s sick) and the shoot was pretty easy today so after making sure that the time is enough, at around 12 we started filming the first scene.
Siddhi helped me again today, taking pictures. I told her that my inspiration is Tim Walker’s Lil’ Dragon. A bit motion blur and she captured it flawlessly!!
Yve and Fiorella help me on the garments. I kinda had to hands-on today for the styling because Yve modelled for me yesterday so I know how to put the clothes better. Had to note it to myself to focus on the directing part.
The bad habit that I got is, every time I was in a pinch I kinda panicked and it makes my decision making fell short. I ended up with a lot of ‘what ifs’ and ‘should’ves’ on post-production. I should’ve used a black backdrop for the floor to accentuate the white garments. I should’ve thought more thorough about how to style the garment. I should’ve did a lot more on the set design and so on. But in the end, I decided to write it down for my future self and just suppressed the feeling with gratefulness that I’m able to film the whole shot list and done it safely. And even if we’re late, we did it! So beautifully as well!
Some polaroids that I took today
We went straight to post-pro over the weekend now!
The crew today: me, Irfan, Siddhi, Yve, and Jodie (makeup artist). A lot of friends came later, some to be my colourful creatures (thank you Ellen, Joy, Jessi, and Wenqi! <3). Some came to talk and liven up space. I had a blast today!
Also today I did the fitting for tomorrow with Yve.
We can’t try one of them though because it’s too small for Yve. I hope it’ll be fine on the model tomorrow!
For the costume, I contacted some CSM students. I went to their White Show Instagram account (@opus.19) and searched for the right garments for my short film. Some of them tagged on the photos, found their names in one of the photos (attached below) and just searched them. Or look at the following/likes from some people or posts. They are all excited to participate in the film and to be honest, it’s quite the burden. But I need to fake it to make it right.
So I choose 6 of them to portray the cocoon (picture attached below)
One of the chat with the CSM student that I contacted. As almost all of them haven’t got back to London, I made appointments with all of them to meet up on the 7th at CSM.
The only props that I need is a mirror and I was kind of relaxed about it since I made an appointment with National Gallery. But three days before the shoot I found out they don’t have full-length mirror. So I canceled the appointment and rushed to search for another hire place, amazon, and ebay. One hire place called Granger Hertzog. They have cool stuff that I think will suit the film.
Unfortunately it cost around £100 and I prefer not to take it since my laptop crashed at that time and I had to spend a lot on it 🙁 but I thought it will be my last resort if I couldn’t find anything. Then I tried to google mirror again and I!!! found!!! it!!! Sold at Argos with half price and I can grab it from Shepherd’s Bush’s branch which is nearby school. And I can return them. Perfect. I got it two days before the shoot.
As for the studio, I called the media store first thing in the morning at 10am and they told me they will send an email when the booking system is up. I tried to wait at first but then my feeling told me that I have to open the orb webpage. And voila! It’s open! And there are many spots left for studio 2, 5, and 4!!! I’m so happy I literally booked the three of them at first, because the date of the shoot wasn’t fixed yet, I need to adjust with my cousin, Irfan’s schedule. Then we decide on 9 & 10, so I let go the studio 2 on the 8th and decided on studio 5 on the 10th. I feel super happy that I got the studio :’)))) I got all the equipment as well and thankfully as Irfan goes to Metfilm School he can get all the equipment needed that are not available in Lime Grove.
I collected the clothes from CSM students today and will go to CSM again tomorrow (because of the changes on shooting date). A textile student from CSM, Wenqi, collaborated with me and helped me find fabrics and created these colourful creatures:
Thanks to my flatmates Sophie and Emily for being my fitting model!
I contacted the models and makeup artist. The model confirmed for the dates, but the makeup artist couldn’t make it because she forgot and had an interview appointment. Thankfully she recommended me one of her assistants who also go to LCF. And I asked some of my friends as well just to be safe so we’re good.
And for the clothes for stage 1, as the designers that I contacted and Fashion Crossover haven’t replied to my message yet I decided to buy a dress from Topshop. I think the shape and colour fit with the image that I imagined.
I’m excited!!
I made a production deck! Here to see: https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1Zm-7F0rjfZ3rH8eAIJiOT2qMZPo6jCexyvnSJ8UDckg/edit?usp=sharing
So, the film will be divided into three parts. The idea is she is in her new environment, and here we explore how enclothed cognition influenced her:
Act 1
Sound of drowning at the start signalling a person got into her ‘state of mind’, being drowned in thoughts and pulled into her deepest consciousness. Her circling around illustrates how it is in her mind, it’s wandering in a loop without knowing what to do. But the root of her problem relies on her (in the mirror).
She wears pale makeup and dress, emphasizes the lack of self-esteem. She’s the centre point of the introduction, how her appearance makes her anxious. Then her personal space got invaded when she is surrounded by bright-coloured creatures (I want them to have different shapes and colours) that she thinks more ‘superior’ than she is. She feels intimidated, and it creates havoc inside.
Act 2
She got into her deepest core, trying to seek protection, she goes into her clothes (the idea of clothes as environment). The clothes then get bigger each time, creating a cocoon. The clothes also illustrate the feeling of overwhelmedness that she experienced. It’s somehow a paradox, but in the end, she chose the clothes as her weapon that helps her to find assurance. She’s wearing bold makeup, signing that in spite of the insecurities there’s a self inside her that is confident. This also ‘metaphorically’ shows how the clothes boost her self confidence from inside.
Act 3
She got back from the chaos of her mind, her eyes glistening, her makeup is the same as stage 1, but added bright colour (on her eyes/lips) to illustrate her newfound confidence. She falls repeatedly, but able to stand up in the end. This shows even though life breaks her down so many times, she’ll keep her stance upright. She takes a deep breath, signing a new energy chiming into her body. Despite all the chaos, she decided to move forward.
On the 10th of December, I did lighting and stereoscopic test at the studio in Limegrove with my cousin to make sure that no issue will happen on the shooting day later. We tried studio 4, one of the options if we couldn’t get studio 2 or 5. The most important thing we need is the rig as we’re doing spotlight lighting. A wider studio also needed so ideally studio 2 would suffice. I just hope I can book it since the media store told me they’ll email when the booking opens. They’ll open in the first week but the booking dates won’t out yet.
I started the research by reading journals and watching a lot of review and tutorials on filming technique (use of colours, angle, etc) on Youtube to further enhance the idea.
After reading some journals on enclothed cognition (although there’s only one that formally coined the term and studied it, the rest are extended analysis on enclothed cognition), I understand that the concept is how clothes affect us inwardly. So for the film, I need to create a story that happens inside the mind instead of the outside environment. That is why I ditched the bedroom idea and switched it to just her and a mirror in the middle of empty space.
I tried to create a story:
Overwhelmed by the new environment, Kala (temp name for the character in the movie) keeps on feeling uncomfortable in her space, creating chaos inside her. She resides to her ‘clothes’, embracing her identity, and despite all the inner havoc, she decided to move forward.
Now I just need to make production deck and confirm the dates and availability with the crews involved.
After my first three tutorials, I decided to halt my shoot to further research and prepare the idea. I tried to create a mind map to really search for a theory that could serve as a ground for my outcome. I tried to do mind map but still can’t find anything.
And on the last tutorial with Vicky before the winter holiday, I got quite confused because I was asked where the fashion context is in the idea. I felt very discouraged. Should I ditch the idea again and thinking for a completely new idea? I panicked a lot. I thought of several ideas on how to portray what I’m really trying to say and portray in my film.
Then after a couple days of contemplating, I remember Ellie said to shift the environment from the physical environment to ‘clothes’ as an environment. So I think fashion as therapy is the right keyword for my initial research of the topic. When I searched related topic around fashion as therapy, I stumbled upon the term ‘enclothed cognition’, to put it simply: how your clothes affect you psychologically. It is a part of a bigger cognition theory, embodied cognition. The study said that our bodily experience actually influences our mind.
For me, this is an interesting topic–if you search on the internet, you will find a lot of people talking about clothes to wear to feel more confident or items that provide you support and help you cope with stress (not to forget that shopping is also considered as a therapy!). So although the study has still a lot to prove, I feel this is a good basis to experiment.
I’ll try to dig deeper into enclothed cognition and watch a lot of tutorials, reviews, and read books about angles, colour theory, and techniques to decide how the mise en scène would be.
From the first tutorial, I got recommendations from Vicky on stereoscopic moving image, a music video by IAMX called Bernadette and a short film by Martin Arnold which he kept repeating or going forward-backwards to create a new meaning to a scene.
Continuing my nightmare story, I got inspired by this animation video by Robert Ek. It gives an uncomfortable, unsettling feeling when you watch it. This one image illustrates how my first weeks in London felt like.
Because of this video, I tried to search for videos of the most unsatisfying things on Youtube. (Disclaimer: they’re unsatisfying in many ways).
From these videos, I decided to portray the idea of ‘nightmare’ with an agonizing video. I wanted to challenge myself by going out of my comfort zone; I’ve always been creating stills so storyboard and film are new for me. I also should practice more on editing, so I’d like to edit the video myself (with a little help from here and there).
I can’t decide for now whether to film all the scenes myself, pair it partially with footages from other works or completely making an experimental film with footages from other works to exercise storytelling through film. If I can’t get any studios this December I’d probably choose the last option or filming anything that I can this December and continue it in January.
For Fashion Media Lab, I was thinking of creating something related to my research and final project. I wanted to treat this unit as a practice or trial and error ground before making the final product next year. But honestly, I’ve been stuck on what to make for the MA final project so I decided to do something different.
At first, I wanted to apply the stereoscopic technic and make (as I discussed with Vicky before) a visual narrative of photographic setups with high styling. I love fairy tales and fantasy characters, especially about deities. I have this one idea that hasn’t been executed since a year ago: a series of triplets Gods photography.
The idea is to have the three in each set design with a different colour palette. The colour was chosen to further emphasize the mood of each deity’s existence. The Moirai will be white since it represents life, which is pure, sincere and innocent. As it signifies passion, strength and desire, red is chosen for the Erinyes. Black will be the Oneiroi’s colour for it represents mysterious, authority and fear.
After the first tutorial, I was doing further research about the three pairs and discovered that The Moirai actually have agents. When Atropos decide how an individual die, it will notify a certain agent to do the job. A cruel and violent death means The Keres, blood-thirst spirits, will do the job. Peaceful or nonviolent death will require Thanatos, a God of death that will guide the soul to the underworld. I found the story more intriguing than the Erinyes and thinking of changing them into Keres. So the story would be around life/death or conscious/unconscious–and they’re all the children of Nyx, the Goddess of night.
But the deeper I dig into the stories, the more I become confused about how to change this idea into a film. Especially when I created this idea, the output that I thought of are still images. That is why I decided to ditch this idea and try to find another one that is similar and more doable.
While thinking about this, I can’t help but feel a sense of panic. I couldn’t sleep, thinking that I wouldn’t make it this unit. Then I remember my own experience. On the first weeks in London, I had nightmares. Sometimes the story continues from one dream to another. The feeling of not doing good enough, overwhelmed, being chased, pressured, and rushed all together haunted me. I think the occurrence can be a good starting point. I will explore the idea more for the concept and output.